Mental Skills

Just shot a friend while a conversation about business… Heart vs. Brain. Life vs. Stress - it’s all calming down.
Photo by Christian Erfurt / Unsplash

If you gain something, it is tainted by the same energy as not having it, which is the fear of losing it. It’s pressure and a formidable form of resistance that robs us blind of the enjoyment of having what we worked so hard for. In sport, we blame pressure for much of our discomfort pre-race.

We have this bizarre idea that when we achieve that perfect outcome, that it will lessen the pressure and we will be happy beyond measure, and only the opposite is true.

I know this from direct coaching and life experience. There is only one thing worse than not getting what you want, and that is to get what you want.

Because now you have the pressure of trying to hold onto it and that is pure resistance, it drains the presence from your body as your head carries you off to try to protect the unprotect-able.

The energy is now draining from your presence, creating a vortex of exactly the conditions you don’t want. Because you are focusing on what you don’t want to lose, you are creating the perfect conditions for loss.

The focus is moving toward anxiety and away from your presence. Anxiety moves up your body into your head and you lose your ground. Presence moves down your body and connects your feet firmly to the ground. This is the dark side of pressure!

Photo by Stefano Pollio / Unsplash

Now, another way to look at this is to simply call pressure, protection. That’s what it really is. In all aspects of life we can see this, and there is another very simple line that brings clarity here. The fear of loss! The loss of my money, the loss of my youth, looks, house, car, income, the fear my wife or husband will run off with someone else, and the list goes on.

We tell ourselves protection is positive. It is no such thing, it is a form of resistance that causes us such anxiety and takes away the beauty in life which is totally dependent upon non-resistance and trust.

We call this non-attachment.

If you want to know the truth of your potential, then really try to understand the following statement. It has been a key understanding for me in the unfolding of my own truth.

In order to let it come, you have to let it go!

This is the light that shines onto pressure. You’ll never find trust, until you learn how to let go.

Broken hearts, broken dreams, loss of loved ones, honour it all by letting it leave.

Because you know what?

Regardless of what you are losing, you are not leaving, you are still here. You are choosing between pressure, protection and trust.

Ask yourself. Which is the heavier and which is the lighter of the two, trust or pressure?

One is made of love, the other is made of cynicism.

You’ll never know the benevolence of trust until you can let go of the pressure.